Friday, August 7, 2009

Electric Eyes Toilets



Sometimes progress can get in the way of common sense. YouknowwhutImeanVern?
Take the newfangled toilets in some places with their electric eyes that give a great big flush when one is through using the facilities—that is if they are operating correctly. If it works right, you walk away and it goes WHOOSH! Everything is gone quick as a flash. Well, I did say if everything works right. However, all of us who have used these modern miracles of toilet brains know they don’t always perform as projected.
For instance, how many times have you walked over to the extra long sink basement at Wally World only to have your hands drag through the soapy bottom? Now you tell me, why if they were gonna spend that much money fixing the restrooms in the supercenters, why couldn’t they have spent two more dollars and made it deeper so your hands didn’t bump the bottom where everyone’s hands have deposited whatever their hands deposit, huh? Now I’m just getting started with my beef. You women folks can skip over this paragraph because it has to do with the things that hang on the walls just for men. I’m wondering how does it know when I’m standing there? Just who is looking through the electric eyes? Furthermore, how does it know when I’m finished with my business? Guys, have you ever almost finished and had it go off before you were ready to step back, and did it startle you enough to make you jump? Well, you get the idea. There are all kinds of things that can happen that might prove embarrassing to you when you exit the
Restroom. Need I say more?
Now ladies, since you must seek the privacy behind closed doors—that is if you really believe those electric eyes are not working in a manner in which you don’t want it to work. As you enter the so-called privacy cubicle, you really do hope it is private—now I don’t mean to plant any insecurity ideas in your mind—but who really came up with the idea that you might somehow need help electronically to go WHOOSH when you’re through. Furthermore, think of the possibilities of one going off early. Can you say bidet`? I personally sympathize with the fairer sex because if something goes awry in the privacy of the cubicle and it gets stuck in the WHOOSH WHOOSH WHOOSH mode, I can see where it might panic one into getting out prematurely and you need to ask hubby if there is any paper trail hanging onto your shoes or worse yet you know where.
After all this, and the too-narrow sink to wash hands, then one has to get to the blower. Who in the world ever thought that thing up? Having to wait for the electric eye to blow enough air to dry one’s hands can be troublesome to say the least. Let me state unequivocally, those things never have worked well and especially if there are no buttons on them to press as long as needed to dry your hands.
Just wondering?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

And after you carefully wash your hands and get them finaly dry with that other thing that blows hot air .... how do we open the door and keep those yukky germs off your hands as you use the nasty door handle to get out of the bathroom???
Luv ya, Dad!